The Dutchman's Lampoon

Union College’s premier (and only) satirical publication / competitive ritual sacrifice club team.

Top 6 Best Toothpastes You Need to Go Out and Buy Right Now

Arm & Hammer Advanced Whitening with Baking Soda – Workers unite to fight plaque under this proletariat friendly toothpaste brand. Soon oppressed across…

New President Education at Union College

by An Anonymous Group of Alive Former Union College Presidents As every college student knows all too well, one does…

“Jungle Conservation Efforts: WE NEED U!”

The Davy Jungle is in extreme danger. The state of the Jungle has been rapidly deteriorating. A new report, published…

Student Triples Declining by Investing in Low Volatility Stocks and Corporate Bonds

Schenectady, NY–sources reported Monday that sophomore Alan T. has been able to increase his dining declining points by investing them…

Scientists Discover New Species called “Freshmen” Inhabiting Davidson Jungle

A rare species was discovered by a team of wildlife researchers Tuesday morning in Schenectady, New York USA. The team…

Union College Residential Life Announces Implementation of Virtual Housing Program

While adjusting to our new normal, Residential Life finds itself under heavy pressure from the Board of Trustees to find…

THE “OTHER” PANDEMIC THAT CAME WITH COVID-19

When COVID-19 began to rage across the United States, our daily lives changed for the unforeseeable future. Our new normal…

Pete Buttigieg Learning About Problems Facing Rail Infrastructure By Spending Week Living As Train

“ I’ve spent seven days as a cross-country passenger train, transporting thousands of Americans under my own power so I can better understand the plight of our great railways…” said Buttigieg.

Interior Decorating Tricks To Make Your Tiny Apartment Look Brown (The Onion)

View the slide show with tips and tricks to make your tiny apartment look various shdes of brown.

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