It’s bizarre being home and not having anyone who shared the same experience to talk to. It’s bizarre walking around my town and neighborhood. All I do is compare it to what I witnessed. Every time I complain about something insignificant, I scold myself. And every time someone asks me about the trip, I try my hardest to define it in a simple, brief, and honest way. But it’s not really definable. Every person I’ve told, I get praise for what an amazing thing I did, and I try to explain how the experience was amazing, but how little of a difference we can actually make, unless we devote our lives to making a difference. I don’t think of this as a community service miniterm anymore. For me, and I think I can speak for my peers, this was more of a community awareness miniterm, which was very significant in my growth as a person and as a college student. Returning to the holidays was very strange. The transition was fast. It was as if time sped up and I was thrown in to the joyful and boisterous holiday spirit. Although it is called the season of giving, I also think of it as the season of forgetting and ignoring, as some people seem to neglect the hardships of others and maybe even their own, and immerse themselves in the moment. But that’s what people do to survive. They live in the moment, like Jimmy and Adelle in Dulac. For the few hours we spent with them, they were so happy to have company and to socialize with us. We were their holiday season and joy. So in that way, we made a difference for a moment. But moments don’t last forever. And that’s what I learned about service. It must last for more than just a moment. It must be eternal.

Being home doesn’t feel like I expected it would. I expected to feel comfort in being around my own things. Instead it felt lonely. I guess it would have felt different if I went home instead of going back to my empty dorm room back on campus. I have to admit having 16 other people around might have been the best thing for me. Growing up as an only child I never was accustomed to being teased or having to share almost everything with any one. To be honest I miss the group which I thought I might but never this much. I find myself watching Saint games, looking at pictures and videos reminiscing on an experience that just concluded. Going out in Schenectady to meet up with my co-workers was a bit of an experience. Some had actually noticed that I was missing and others didn’t care. The same thing happened when I returned from Australia exactly one year before. It really puts the significance that you might think you have into a real context which can be quite painful if the doses aren’t administered slowly or in small increments. When not in the glass half empty mindset I would say that it felt nice and easy to get used to my bed and my computer (all the selfish mine mine mine things). The hardest and saddest things were the loneliness that is associated with not being home for the holidays. The most surprising thing about coming back is the amount of physical and personal growth that had occurred in just 2 weeks. I now know my way around dry wall and other matters of house construction as well as having the ability to start to grow comfortable with all the sides of myself. Next time someone says “Who dat?” I’ll be able to give them a better and honest response of who I am.
This was an amazing experience that will continue to have an affect on me for years to come.

I returned home, selfishly craving the luxuries of my bed, my moms cooking and the company of my family during the holidays. During the final days in Dulac all I wanted was to go home because I felt so useless and alone sometimes and now that I am home I wish I could be more proactive and I almost miss the constant opportunities to help people. As an update I have been in contact with Nat Turner about applying for Extreme Home Makeover and I have written a letter to someone else rather important that I feel could make a significant difference in his life. He really was inspiration to me.
After being home for a week, I must say that it has been especially difficult summing up this trip into a presentable explanation quick enough for the short conversations I have had with everyone I’ve run into since being home. Even though it isn’t appropriate for short passing-by talk, I really want to let everyone know what it was like. I also must say that it has been extremely hard to convey how exactly I feel about the trip to people. When my friends ask about it they expect that it was more recreational in nature and so they don’t understand why I don’t exclaim about how much “fun” it was. How I feel about the trip is way more complex than just an adjective for fun, because it wasn’t all fun, and it wasn’t supposed to be. It was real. We were getting involved in real situations that real people are facing on a daily basis and the disappointment, the poverty and the amount still needing to be fixed is real. And in the end, we had to walk away from these real people, barely scratching the surface of what needs to be done for them and everyone living that way. It is such a contrast to our daily-pampered college student lives, where “the real world” is still in the distance, after college.

As we begin to wrap up our last day of work it is hard to believe that we are going to be going back to New York tomorrow. Our group has had its ups and downs in Dulac but as a whole I believe we really came together. It is hard going from New Orleans where everything is very structured and organized, to jumping into a place where we have to do everything ourselves. There was little instruction and help with our projects so we had to rely on each other to get things accomplished. At first it took a little getting used to but finally, by the last day, we figured how to set our day up so everyone can be involved and know exactly what needed to be done. It took time but we got everything done that we hoped to.

Today is the last day in Dulac, LA. We have been hitting a ton of rough patches both in terms of personal issues and the logistics of the community service in the bayou. This trip has really had a powerful impact on me and my views on society, government, and most importantly myself. The journey has showed me both my strengths and my weaknesses. I came on this trip with the intentions on making a difference to those in need without ever considering the affect this interaction would have on myself. In the end I have realized that I am a part of something much bigger than myself and should feel privileged even when times are hard because there are people making it in the world on less resources than I. This has truly been a humbling experience that I will treasure. The good, the bad, and the ugly have all accumulated to give me an adventure that will stay with me for the rest of my life.

Today was supposed to be another day of painting, but the weather did not cooperate. So, we gathered in the kitchen and were assigned small task for the day. Some of us were setting for the Indian Santa event in the Dulac Community Center Gymnasium; some were organizing the closet in the back of the DCC gym; and Leigh, Joe, and I were going back over the Shrimper’s Row to re tile a bathroom floor in an abandoned house. When we arrived at the house to inspect the condition of the floor, we discovered that someone had already tried and half completed the flooring incorrectly. An adhesive was used to connect the pieces of flooring, some pieces still didn’t fit correctly, and it was just a mess. Needless to say, my first reaction was frustration and we decided the best way to handle this was completely remove the work that had been done on the floor and start from scratch. We ripped out the flooring and gave Jamie a call; our new assignment was to scrape up flooring the front room, which I assume will be re tile or repainted in the near future.

Today, when the five of us; Kayla, Leigh, Shari, Joe and I were scraping up the flooring, I must admit I was starting to get sore almost immediately. Bending down and scarping off flimsy pieces of flooring was again frustrating, but eventually it got done and after putting the tools away and loading up the van, we were headed back to DCC.

As soon as we got back to DCC, we got another call from Jamie asking for our help moving plywood and sheet rock from her house to the center. After waiting a few minutes, I voiced my decision to help with this project and so did Leigh. Shari and Kayla decided to go back inside, and honestly I can’t blame them because today’s weather was certainly not ideal. The lighter pieces of wood fit into the van easily enough, but for the sheet rock and plywood, we needed Jamie’s dad’s pick up truck. So, it ended up being Isaiah, Joe, Leigh and I moving wood pieces, plywood and sheet rock to DCC. I was extremely grateful for everyone’s help today because I just feel exhausted. I think this trip has finally at least some toll on me physically if not emotionally.

It’s been more than a week in Louisiana and we have just moved on from city life in New Orleans to what seems to be the middle of nowhere known as Dulac. Before this drastic transition between such contrasting places, I learned a lot in New Orleans. I have never in my entire life felt more welcomed to a place than I felt by every single person I met here. It was fairly obvious how passionate the people here are for this place and it seems as if their main goal is to show everyone that comes here, exactly why New Orleans is so valuable. From this, I have drawn the conclusion that there is not a catastrophe devastating enough that could stop the heart of this city, and it will stay alive forever with the passion exuded by its inhabitants.
Aside from living in the constant epitome of southern hospitality, I also learned so much about the institutions and organizations that I thought were implemented for our protection but instead are fraudulent and plagued with scandal and deceit. I am less eager to trust government institutions like the FDA who blatantly ignore and provide cover-ups to the obvious dangers of dispersants and the oil spill just to see the numbers they want on their paychecks. I am less willing to support a criminal justice program filled with dirty cops out with racist attempts to fill the jails in New Orleans and take advantage of people ignorant to their rights as citizens. Its just amazing to me to see the extent people will go to amass wealth, even if that involves neglecting their actual occupational purpose which results in mistreatment of the citizens the institutions were ironically set in place to protect.
The day at Our School At Blair Grocery (www.ourschoolatblairgrocery.org) was the most inspirational day on this trip thus far. Nat Turner lives without walls or electricity and has often times found himself living off of bags of coins and teaching out of his only possession; a school bus. He teaches kids from his neighborhood that have been brought up in environments not optimal for high success rates, fraudulent with drugs and crime. Regardless of the fact that the visible success that he has with these children is a slow process that often contains multiple set backs and disappointment, he has devoted his entire life and intelligence to making his world a better place, slowly but surely. That to me is volunteerism at its highest form, because he has committed every ounce of his energy to his passion of helping the children around him that wouldn’t have a chance at success without his attention. It was just so inspiring to meet a man that has invested everything he has into seeing the change that he wishes to see. He mentioned that only one of us would walk away and actually do something with the knowledge and tools he shared with us. I want to be that one person and I have made a promise to myself not to let him down, because he deserves the best and I would love for him to be the start of a chain reaction of passionate good deeds that I too will pass on. Thanks to Nat Turners immaculate perspective and level of articulacy, I am motivated now more than ever before to give everything I have to change the world, and I promise that I will make it happen, just wait….

Today was by far the most stressful day of our trip. We ran into a lot of problems at our work site that we were not at all prepared for. Going in, we knew that the house may have not been cared for properly, and that unsanitary conditions might exist. However, based on the failure of our action plan, it became clear that none of us were expecting the condition of the house to be as bad as it was. We realized that trying to fix different parts of the house that were clearly in bad shape, like a few boards on the wheelchair ramp, insulation under the house, and a floor tile would be like trying to cure the symptoms of a disease without trying to cure the disease itself. What we found was vermin infestation, mold, and bad jobs that would have to have been completely redone. In all honesty, however, I feel like the way that we confronted the problems was worse than the actual problems themselves. From the get-go there should have been communication about the possibility that houses might be in such severe conditions, and what we might do if we encountered such conditions.

I couldn’t help but thinking, at least in this case, we were committing some pretty blatant “voluntourism,” in which we came to “help” people we knew were in need, but did not prepare ourselves or do enough research to actually be able to have any impact. I began to wonder: wouldn’t it have been better for us to use all the money we spent on air fare for 17 of us on fixing up this persons house? Part of me still thinks that that would have been more effective. The only thing that I can tell myself to justify the way we did it is that maybe, after learning all we have on this trip, we will each go out in the world thinking more about how our actions, and the careers we choose, effect other people and society in general.

In the end, we had to face our situation and simply finish the small jobs that we had started; we just didn’t have the resources to completely tear apart and rebuild the entire floor. I can only hope that the Dulac Community Center will one day have the resources and volunteers to do so.

One thing I learned today is the importance of swallowing our pride and admitting the fact that we really have no idea what we are doing, and being honest with ourselves about the conditions of things and what we can really accomplish. Like at the house today, nothing can get done if we had not assessed the severity of the situation. However, it was just as important for us to remain positive in the face of the impossible, and do what we could with all that we had.

After hurricane Katrina occurred in 2005, there was always information on television or in the news discussing some aspect of the disaster. Eventually all of the disaster hype seemed to slowly disappear. Five years after the disaster happened, it is surprising to see how parts of New Orleans have been left devastated and left in poor conditions. I expected that five years after the storm, the government and the people living in the area would take the initiative and the time to fix their city and make sure everyone had a decent home to live in and in proper conditions. I did not expect to see that the lower 9th ward had most of the houses boarded up, left deserted, or homes that still have to be gutted and repaired. It was shocking to see how it seems that repairing  New Orleans has been left to volunteers and non profit organizations than to the government and other top organizations. Also, although that many thousands of homes still need to be repaired, the people of New Orleans that we met were very kind to us and very thankful for how we were spending our time helping their community. I would have expected the people to feel very bitter about their situations and want to move away from future disasters.

This week I learned that communication, patience, and dedication are the main factors in making service work smoothly. If people are willing to work together for the same goal and listen to each other a project can successfully be completed. The groups we have worked with so far need volunteers who are willing to stay at a project site until the project is complete. It takes much longer to finish a project with different volunteers only at a site for a week at a time then to complete the project at one time with people who are already familiar with the work. These groups also need volunteers who are dedicated to getting the job done well. I think good service is distinguished from just volunteering by getting the job done by seeing the project through and getting to meet and understand who you are completing the project for. The longer a group or person is a part of a project donating their time helps them learn about the culture and the surrounding environment, which can differentiate volunteers from good service.

My experience so far in New Orleans:

What did you learn this week about the situation here in New Orleans that you didn’t expect or hadn’t thought about or were surprised by?

All my life, I have been told that the government is here to make our lives better. They create policies that protect our communities, provide us with basic education and are there to help when we need it. I found out that all of those are false. The organization that we have been raised to trust is not trustworthy at all. Jim, one of the co-founders of PNOLA said that the government did not help rebuild NO at all. It was the people in the community and volunteers that have contributed to NO’s restoration.

What have you learned this week about service? What kind of volunteers do the groups we’ve worked with need?  How is good service distinguished from just ‘volunteering’?

I learned that service is a good and not so good thing. It’s good to help people, but it’s not good to do all the work for them. Community service should be more about setting up the building blocks. The only way to provide service to the entire community is to teach them how to make their lives better. Nontheless, extra hands are always needed in rebuilding 🙂 Communities really need long time volunteers. This goes along with what I was saying about the Peace Corps. Volunteers stay in their community for two years to develop a connection with the community and to teach them how they can improve. They can taket or leave it, but seed planting is the important concept. Therefore, volunteering is a temporary job, but service provides a community with solutions (not just a band-aid).

Day (9) Update

Monday. We were back into motion! Monday was a nice day because we were able to see how much our work was appreciated. Jimmy is a disabled man who has a hard time keeping up with his house. Some of us helped inside the house and some of us worked on the yard. There were about 8 people working on the yeard and it took us about 3 hours to complete it. At the end of the day it was rewarding because we didn’t use any electric tools (ie. lawn mower or weed wacker). Instead, we just used our positive attitudes and a bit of hard work. At the end of the day, it felt extremley accomplishing. Also, it was nice working out in the fresh air!

Day (10)-Today

I have been waiting for this day the whooooole trip! We finally worked on restoring the wetlands or as Mel the coordinator would say “Saving the world!”. This was definitley a treat for me. If you don’t know, I am a plant ecologist and my thesis is on forest restoration. For my thesis, my professor (Hi Jeff!) and I planted 1,500 oak seeds over the span of two days. Today we plated 1,000 seedlings that had probably grown about 2 feet high. The bigger the plant, the more time consuming to plant. Nontheless, it was nice to work with something that I love. AT the end of the day, I realized that we have it pretty good in New York. Whenever a wetland is destroyed in NY (by a company), the company has to pay to rebuild a wetland. But, declicate, endangered wetlands are (usually) State Preserves. That way, they are protected by the state and there are strict regulations in destroying it. So far, we have not seen one State Preserve in Louisiana. Therefore, anything is free game for destruction. Maybe if Louisiana’s oil companies stopped messing with nature, restoration projects could be successful. But, I get the feeling that the state may be too interested in money to restrict oil companies. Since healthy wetlands protect against storm surges, hurricanes did not do a terrible amount of damage in the past. Due to the rapid depletion of the wetlands, hurricanes have a much greater effect on the communities within Southern Louisiana. In the end, money is what is destroying the wetlands and increasing storm surges. What a shame.